Forty six weeks out from surgery, and here are the numbers I care about:
- Weight: 243
- Blood Sugar: 104
Down half a pound. It hasn’t been a great week. I mean, it’s been fine for me I guess, but in the last week yet another unarmed black man has been killed by police, and the resulting riots, have led to local curfews, the president threatening to invoke the Insurrection Act, and just a tidal wave of disappointing blather on social media, much of it from people I love. So, it’s been a scary week. And I’ll avoid talking about the politics and the systemic racism – here – and instead I’ll focus on the stress and the stress eating, which is a thing (even if it shouldn’t be, just accept this).
Mostly I didn’t stress eat this week. Mostly I’ve been active every day, even if only for a little bit. Mostly this is because I’m not going through this alone. I have my wife, Annette, going through this with me, and we’ve gotten pretty good at motivating each other / calling each other out on some of our bad habits.
But damn the temptation has been there, and a few times I’ve given in. The real difference, when I give in to it these days, is what gets eaten. We have a bag of low-cal popcorn in the house. I think a serving is a cup. Sunday night, maybe Monday night, I probably went through three cups, probably in under ten minutes. I didn’t feel sick (I honestly wish I did), and I wasn’t even full when I stopped. But I did stop. Something clicked in my head and I realized what I was doing to myself, and I stopped. A year ago that would’ve been a pound and a half of tacos.
(I had tacos yesterday. I ordered three, ate two, and gave the third to my buddy. That was lunch. I was so full still by dinner that I just had a cup of granola and some high-protein milk, and called it a night. Holy shit, can I not eat tacos like I used to.)
So I guess the takeaway is that bingeing is something that still happens, but I’ve…gotten better at it? Is that even a thing?
STILL waiting to hear back from Kaiser. This is here for me, not you. Move along.
I’m really doing my best to keep a positive attitude and stay happy, but the world around me is on fire, and all I appear to be able to do is take the dogs for a walk and stay off Facebook (#FuckFacebook). And eat three cups of popcorn when I inevitably succumb to madness. Two more weeks of school, and I get to stop being overworked for a few months.
Here, have a graphic: