Sixteen weeks out from surgery, and here are the numbers I care about:
- Weight: 304
- Blood Sugar: 99
Well, shit. Talk about a mixed bag. I put on a pound this week. This is something I’ve known was coming. I’m obviously not happy about it, but I’m also not flinging myself into a depression. Some relevant things to take note of:
- The one pound could be from any number of things, but that hasn’t stopped me from obsessively going over every meal from the last week, which is something I can easily do thanks to my stupid app. I had to stop myself before that turned into a rabbit hole (that I really really really really really cannot afford right now).
- After obsessively going through the last week of eating, nothing was terribly different. In fact the only difference is that yesterday I actually got just over 100 grams of protein in, which is something I’m thrilled about because that’s going to be the new daily minimum (it’s my current daily maximum) in a few months and I didn’t know if it was possible.
- I’ve been less active this week. Since the last update, I’ve graded 150ish essays. This is too much sitting. And as much responsibility as I feel for getting my feedback to my students in a reasonable amount of time, I need to feel that same level of responsibility for taking care of myself, and that is the real struggle I’ve been writing about the last four months. At some point this surgery I had is going to stop taking care of me, and everything will be on my shoulders.
- Annette just told me her first weight gain was at four months (she’s seven and a half months out, and she’s continued to lose in spite of occasional weight gain). That helps more than I can adequately express, so I won’t try.
- My new jeans are looser on me this week. I don’t know how it’s possible to gain a pound and lose an inch (or even a fraction of one) but if anything’s capable of that, it’s the human body. Because the human body is a mysterious, gaslighting dick.
- One pound this close to a major milestone feels a little like ten. #Fuckballs
Okay, but I said mixed bag, didn’t I? You’ll notice my blood sugar is below 100. Normally my reaction would be, “Who cares?” There’s a lot of fluctuation with blood sugar (as there is with weight…), and who cares if it hovers on either side of 100?
Except I’ve been off ALL diabetes medication for six days now! #FuckYes
I’m still taking my statin, which I hate (I miss grapefruit so much), but other than that and my allergy pill, I’m medication free. That pound can fuck off, I’m not letting it ruin my day.
I’m happy. Obviously.
Here, have a graphic: